Sorry for the Silence

First of all, I want to thank you all for the support you have given me over the whole Red Cross thing. It really means alot to me!!

It looks like I am hitting a hard patch in life & I have no idea how long it will last, or where I will be at the end of it. I don't want to get into a lot of detail right now, but it looks like my marriage is in trouble & I had no idea. I knew my husband was unhappy, but I attributed it mostly to the problems he has been having at work & the demands placed on him by his family. Apparently, although he loves me & says I am his best friend, he is not sure that we will be happy in the "long run". He said that I am not ambitious enough & that he feels like he is my father. YIKES!

So, at this point we are looking for a good counselor, but honestly I don't know how much that will help. We already have good communication & don't express our feelings in screaming fits of rage. Plus, while there are behaviors that we both have that are annoying, that doesn't seem to be the problem. From what I have gathered it seems to be aspects of my personality that are the problem.

I think the worst part is that all weekend he hasn't wanted to talk about it & has been trying to act like everything is normal. Being silly & playful, wanting to spend all our time together. This is just making me even more anxious because I don't know where I stand.

So, that is what is going on right now. Haven't done any knitting in days.. heck, I haven't really eaten in days either. I will try to keep up the journal in the coming weeks, but forgive me if there are long periods of silence.

Thanks.